I'm going on a streak of foods that divide people - where several methods of eating and/or preparation are regarded as the 'best' way to eat them. So I figured I'd keep the trend going and touch on a dietary staple as old as the chicken (though even that is up for debate): Eggs.

Even in colour, scrambled eggs are hard to draw. They just always look like... something else.

Even in colour, scrambled eggs are hard to draw. They just always look like... something else.

It's late sunday morning and you rock up to your local cafe in sweatpants, a hoodie with the hood up and a large pair of shades to hide how ridiculously hungover you are. You order the "Big Breakfast" which is strategically placed at the top of the menu, when price is the last thing on your mind. The waiter asks how you like your eggs. You hesitate.

What to do? Make the wrong choice and it could ruin your recovery breakfast. Things start flying through your mind like "Do they have chives in their scrambled eggs? How do they make their hollandaise sauce? Is it appropriate to ask?" and you fidget uncomfortably on the spot.

Eggs are enjoyed throughout the world, and their preparation varies across cultures and countries. The Japanese like to use it for a variety of things, including tempura batter, soft/spa-boiled in Soba/Udon, hard-boiled in tea or a soy-base stock, raw - mixed with beef bowls. The list is endless. And that's just the Japanese. Chinese people might prefer it fried, or mixed with fried rice. Italians will use it for pasta. The Africans have Shakshuka (the traditional version of what we know as spicy "baked eggs"), the English like theirs scrambled (but differently scrambled to how the French and Americans) and Australians, I find, like theirs poached. But there is only one right way to eat eggs - your way.

Cut back to the cafe - you fiddle about nervously considering the options carefully and weighing the risks, an important step considering the stakes.

"Umm... Poached" you stammer. Because you don't usually get to have poached eggs at home since they're a pain to make, but they're easy enough that the kitchen won't mess it up too bad. The plate comes and two puffy whites sit atop the sourdough toast slice like mozzarella balls. You take one bite and the egg white is raw.

God damnit...

For the record, I like mine scrambled. I think Gordon Ramsay (who is one of my personal heroes) does a great scrambled egg. Everyone should know about the Ramsay Scramble - a culinary cornerstone of the ages.

Let me know how you like your eggs! Fried or Fertilised?

On another note, Chophouse in the CBD does a traditional, yet delicious Scotch Egg. Definitely a go for those roaming about after work.